Between you and I


I like the way you tried
To keep love off my mind
With hands behind your back
No explanation of attack
You filled me with desire
I love the way you chose
To act like no one knows
With a smile around your lips
And your hands around my hips
You replenished the fire

Yet I hope that you will see
More than what you think of me
Because there’s a fine line
Between you and I
So, hold your breath and hide
I won’t try to call tonight
Because like you had feared
Just like you I won’t be here

But I like the way you gave
To expect I would behave
With a glance distant and cold
Like the name that you uphold
I warmed your hands with mine
And I love the way you dared
To feed the undeclared
With a small glimmer of hope
Take the pieces that I broke
And mend them with your eyes

Yet I hope that you will see
More than what you think of me
Because there’s a fine line
Between you and I
So, hold your breath and hide
I won’t try to call tonight
Because like you had feared
Just like you I won’t be here

I won’t let my heart be an empty box
Where echoes of our dreams reside
That got lost
I won’t leave my happiness in your hands
As I wait in vain for you
To understand

Because I hate the way you tried
To keep love off my mind
I despise the way you chose
To act like no one knows
And let us live a lie
Because I hate the way you gave
To expect I would behave
I despise the way you dared
To feed the undeclared
Yet keep it all inside

So, hold your breath and hide
I won’t try to call tonight
Oh, don’t you know you should know
There’s a fine line between you and I
Even after all this time

Brotherhood of Men


Sitting here in the shade of a newly awakened Christmas night, enjoying the childish enthusiasm delivered right after the final stroke – ‘t is a new day. And the best one of all, I write with a borrowed pen as I look up and down at the little yellow light dancing around in our Christmas tree. Charmed, happy, cheerful. And just because of this one day that’s mark quite festively in all our calendars. For there is no day like today. No, not really. Not even my birthday can compare. For everyone all over the world; relatives, dear friends and strangers alike all celebrate this glorious day. Where the things most worth celebrating, the things most precious to us play a leading role. Love, peace and understanding. Loyalty to your family and loved ones and mercy where you should allow it. Like a cloud it floats around, shaking us, making us come to our senses. Forcing us to recognize the principles on which we so much rely. And for one perfect moment it all becomes clear. We feel closer to each other and closer to ourselves. In a brief moment where we share an honest smile, in a glance and a nod that transport the love in our own hearts to the next. And the next and yet the next. A chain reaction of positive attention and admiration. Not just because we allowed ourselves to open up the window to our fragile hearts, but because of our motivation to do so. We still believe. In kindness, in dreams, laughter and sunshine; a brotherhood of men. And, I dare say, if this light shines so brightly in us, just like those darling little yellow ones we so much enjoy, then this world can’t be that wretched a place, can it? There must still be room to breathe and flourish. Indeed, there must be hope left. For the world we know and that of our sons and daughters. And maybe even theirs again. For there is much that can be said for us, for the selfish, irrational ways we can behave… for the important things we have lost track of during the course of time. Man will always be fuelled by emotion more than anything. Not ambition, not prosperity nor skill. Feelings are what make us real, what causes us to stand out and connect. What makes us care. They are what makes our blood flow, our hearts beat, our minds want and our bodies yearn. For things beyond reason and time or space. Togetherness, fondness. Those are the things we are after in life. Our truest if not noblest goal. Even if some of us might not yet have come to realize it. They will. For we all belong to a family outside of our own. And therefore I speak with a smile, while admiring our Christmas tree. “If we have not yet lost our will to laugh, to trust, to love… this world is not a hopeless place. It is only if we decide to settle for less than we desire or deserve that it is a hopeless case.”

Wavering sentiments

When is it we love? Not ourselves but the other?
When is it we see them and not the way they look at us?
When is it we truthfully open our hearts?
Not just to have a quick taste - but to let them in?
When is it we elope with the idea of two people as one?
When is it we dream not just our dream but theirs?
When is it we actually allow ourselves to be caught?
Not just for a little while - but for a lingering moment
When the air seems to chill all but our lips -
And that promise of a life shared grants us an inner smile
When is it we feel content?
When it is we feel ready?
What does it take to fall in love?
To take an offered hand glady?

It's a rule of competition to stay one step ahead of the others
It's a rule of evolution to stay one step ahead of yourself...

Venus' Breath

Like a toy that is broken
Face down on the ground
Left in a corner
Hidden from the crowd
Covered in dust
That collected its heart
With eyes melancholy
Keeping lovers apart
Suffering in stillness
In a beautiful cage
It's a lone execution
Of emotional rage
But no one does notice
For a secret it is
We all keep from the world
The things we most miss

To speak for others and say they're the same
I find that a very bold claim...

Sequence of a Dream


My youth
Like a lake of good ideas
Each one eagerly sparkling in the spring-time sun
Calling out to me with utmost impatience
Making it hard for me to find my focus
A patch of green where I can rest
Next to the flowerbeds underneath the window
Counting my thoughts like they were marbles
And not the sequence of a dream
Putting them in my pocket, calmly
With a song in my head and the wind in my hair
Hurrying myself down the street
Passing the gates and houses and cars
Until the forest opened up to me

The Scientist

The tapestry of time -
Countless ways to interpret how each thread flows
To what purpose and by what design
Like an ocean of matter, including us and all of that we are aware
Driven by a heartbeat beyond our comprehension
Fuelled by a fabric most intricate and invisible
Like a distant star whose light shines but dimly on our intellect
Allowing us but fragmented answers
Never quite revealing the true hands of fate
Leaving chaos in the hearts of independent components
Where our own limits ought to have been enough of a warning

To a Gentleman


If you think of me give a just portrayal
Don’t succumb to careful flattery
For I own my heart; flaws and all
And do not need anyone to polish me
If you speak of me provide the truth
Don’t fall victim to your vain attempts
For I stand my ground; heart and soul
And I need not the cloak of self-pretence

Colourblind


Some people claim virtue lies in restraining
Other will say goodness is measured in words
Many would state truth is born out of wisdom
Additionally quite a few might leave love to fate
Masses of men preach the importance of power
Many more never tire mentioning fame
Yet I ask myself what I should ask no other
Who am I but myself, but my soul with no name?

Wicked


You had so many chances
There were so many ways
But with you I never cease to be amazed

I gave you so many reasons
There were so many lies
But with you all I'm worth are goodbyes

And still there you are
Sitting up there on your thrown
Set with rubies, set with pride
You love yourself and those you own
As you mockingly smile at those below

Great Expectations


Love me not out of consideration
But out of passion and love

Let it be mind-blowing,
The bond we have
Like a pact in the night
Let it be unpredictable,
The road we're on
Like a kiss of fate
Let it be messy,
The time we share
Like a dancing wave

Love me not out of loneliness
But out of fancy and joy

Let it be extraordinary,
The words we use
Like a dying poet's verse
Let it be peculiar,
The way we know each other
Like a secret song
Let it be amazing,
The promises we keep
Like a rose stripped of her thorns

Love me with such intensity and intimicy
That I will never doubt your heart
Love me with such devotion and determination
That I will always want you near
Yet love me as just you could
In your own special way
For love might have it
I shall turn a blind eye
Because it is you I want to stay

Touched


You are my island of sunshine
A place where the clouds do not show
Lying in the tall grass beside you
Your eyes make me tingle and glow
A restless emotion in stillness
Caught by the midsummer trees
You wrap me in your adoration
And whisper you couldn't be more pleased

Slow-paced days spent in a maze
With every road leading to love
Your heart speaks, oh, mine is too weak
I couldn't tell when I've had enough

You are the river that leads me
The song that is stuck in my mind
Together we are writing a story
Every day there's a new word I find
Putting all of the pieces together
I'm so glad I get to admit
While looking at the bigger picture
I'm thrilled that they all seem to fit

Star-shaped tones dance on their own
With every intention to charm
My senses drown now I know what I've found
So, I'll love you 'cause where is the harm?
Yes, I'll love you 'cause where is the harm...

The Game

If life exists out of lessons to be learned

And things to be accomplished

Than is it fair to assume everything can be studied and obtained?

If you try hard enough to get it -

If you invest enough time -

If you ask yourself enough questions -

And celebrate not your ready knowledge -

But the thirst you have for more?

If so, when does it become a danger?

A temptation best to be avoided by you and those around you

-to never sit still, to always second guess, to never just believe, to always have to discover…

When does the ambition to grow

Become the abbreviation of losing

Not just moments in time, where you find yourself busily occupied with frivolous thoughts

But potential dreams, decisions, relationships

One might even say; just a bit of your own character

For it is not how well we know ourselves that states who we are

It is how we pass the time leading us through every stage of life

With every hope, every heartbeat, every anticipated desire

It’s how we rise to the occasion, our feet planted steadily on the ground

How we live with our hearts open, daring to risk additional scratches on our armor

It is even, scary as it may seem, to lay down our armor, to drop our guard

To let people and opportunities in

To live and try and fail and try again

To succeed sometimes yet not often enough to take it for granted

To love sometimes yet not in such quantity we lose our perspective on quality

To find what makes someone special – not just in someone else, but in us

And that is not how much we know or claim to know about the world

Surely it would make life easier to live if every day possessed a certain structure

But it is not a board game we are playing – in which we move from square to square

The map of life is way more complex than that cardboard equation

And something we must learn to understand, accept and adjust to;

We can’t comprehend all there is to know

We can’t learn all there is to learn

Each of us has reasons and motives, wants and fears

And they are what make our silhouettes, the outlines of our lives

So we are able to recognize and tell ourselves apart

By our flaws and our fancies

Arguing from this state of mind, would it not be a pity to ‘just’ strive for perfection

For everything, for all there is?

When we can also be ourselves

A raw version of our ambitions – yet one more real

More honest, more intricate

So, ask yourself not if you can learn everything you can

Instead, ask yourself whether you want to

The Guide

I wish to say goodbye

To the black seed of hate inside my heart

To the negative thoughts residing in my being

To the poisonous whispers in my ear, constantly ringing

Like an empty warning

I ask of me to save myself

I call myself to arms

To rescue what’s left of all the good

That’s buried underneath this cloud

Just trying to get out

I wish to say goodbye

To the pain I know I have caused myself

To the tears I tried to repress

To the past memories full of pretence, still plaguing me with guilt

Like a playwright of my own undoing

I demand of me I better myself

That I might live up to my own expectations

To salvage the pieces I can use

That will hurry up the healing

Just waiting to begin

For dreamer I once was

And I can be again…

Tears on a torn soul

I belong to a house with two homes

Like each heart has two rooms to live in

Divided by invisible walls

That disables their understanding

That keeps me from my own contentment

Unfinished without their uniting warmth

Troubled by the lack of an anchor

I stroll the streets inside my mind

Where I wander without purpose

I find myself in the faces of my family tree

Like each portrait reveals another layer of myself

But the branches are breaking

Rustling the leaves ever so eagerly

Scaring off the raindrops that cling to the blossoms

Confused due to the sudden strain

Hurt by the roughness of the drop

I make my way through my denial

As slowly I come to face the truth

That hands once clasped together firmly,

Symbolizing the epiphany of friendship,

Now choke me out of my last innocence

Leaving hope to fill the unsettling vacancies

For a fruit that provides but little comfort

Should never become my inheritance...